I will never be one of those people that fail upwards. My mistakes don't make me more endearing and my job will never get better if I do it poorly. I'm not traditionally "lucky" like my brother-in-law who wins every drawing that he enters. I won't suddenly have a windfall that solves all my problems or have a million dollar idea after trying for years and failing.
I plod. I plod like the old farm horse that has been plowing the same field year after year. Things get very slowly better for us, because we work our tails off. My students are successful because I work 60-70 hours a week teaching and preparing lessons. My kids are nice because I have spent years drilling in manners.
Today was one of those hard days. The type that make you want to move to Australia. The kind that make you want to quit everything and give up. I sat here thinking about writing it all out, complaining about how hard it was, yelling at how bad today sucked... but then I thought of a conversation I had yesterday.
I was sitting next to a woman from my ward and I shared a story with her and she told me I needed to write it down in a book of remembrance. I don't have a book of remembrance so I guess I will write it here.
We were talking about our sons, who are both in young mens. Ethan is about a year and a half older than her son and was Deacon Quorum president when her son came into young mens. She said she was so appreciative of Ethan because he came over that Sunday to talk with her son and walk him through all of the things they do. She said he taught him what to do when passing the Sacrament, and how they do fast offerings.
I laughed and told her about how shy Ethan is. How it has been physically painful for him, at times, to go out of his comfort zone. I shared that Eric and I were both worried about how he would handle being president and having to talk and coordinate so much. We were happy for him, and thought it would be a learning experience.
It was, but for us. The minute Ethan was set apart he was different. When it came to his calling he was confident, proactive, and organized. It was amazing to see the immediate change, and to watch him grow so much in that calling. He is an amazing young man.
I didn't think about it last night, but my friend from the dance place comes every week to church with her three kids, and her husband isn't there. I have known he was inactive, and I've admired her for her faith. What I didn't think about until just now was that Ethan probably filled in, in a place that she needed a little help. Ethan had Eric to walk him through all that stuff. I'm proud Ethan was there for her son.
We aren't "lucky." We won't win the lotto. But man, we are blessed.
3 comments:
(this is Julia, I'm too lazy to switch to my google ID) That is so great! Stories like that really feel like a windfall in a way, of all the little things you've been trying to teach your kids for years. Thanks for sharing. I'm glad this calling is helping Ethan grow even more!
Well... it was a year ago he had the calling. We were just talking about it last week. He has only grown since then though. He's a pretty cool guy. I'm a lucky mom.
Nicole, you have done an amazing job as wife, mother, and teacher. Never doubt your skills or be hard on yourself. You have great values that you have passed on to your children. I am proud of you and your achievements! Ethan has learned from the best. That's why he did so well in that leadership position!
Post a Comment